agletthatiscracked:

trionerd:

ofunicorndust:

ailuruses:

inspired by this post theorizing that tina’s absence is because she’s taking her turn babysitting blaine. bedtime stories: tina and blaine brotp style.  i think they switch between this and the lorax, they both get weepy every time they get to “unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better.  it’s not.”

ETA: WAIT I FORGOT THE EYEPATCH.  WOOPS, already over it.

“I don’t need a babysitter,” Blaine says when he sees her. Or at least Tina thinks that’s what Blaine’s trying to say.

He’s curled up in bed underneath his enormous comforter. His hair is impeccable, as always, but he’s slurring all his words and he doesn’t seem all quite there. 

“It’s not like Seb-Sebastian - the guy who made all my old friends hate me - it’s not like he can do it again to my other eye,” Blaine says in a tone that suggests that he thinks he’s making a particularly compelling point. “I think he was aiming for Kurt.” He frowns. “I traded a good eye for Kurt.” 

Painkillers. Really really good painkillers. That would do it.

“I’m here to read you a story,” Tina says, opting to distract him when she takes a seat by his bedside. She’s actually not sure if Betty Friedan is Blaine’s cup of tea, but she also has a couple of Where’s Waldo books and The Lorax in her bag which she occasionally uses on her neighbor’s kids when she babysits them. 

Blaine seems to be more interested in talking about Kurt. “I think I would take two slushies in the eye for Kurt,” he says solemnly. “Then I’d have to wear two eyepatches, but Kurt’s eyes are too nice to hurt. They’re like little galaxy planets of blue-green, you know?”  

“They’re very nice,” Tina agrees, amused. Stoned-from-painkillers Blaine resembled Drunk Blaine. 

“You know what’s also nice? Your boyfriend. And his abs,” Blaine reveals, smiling a little vacantly. “Kurt and I once decided that they were the Eighth World Wonder. They’re that nice.” 

“… Blaine, I’m going to need you to hold on a second while I hit record on my phone, okay? And I’m sure Mike would let you touch his abs if you ask nicely.” 

“Really?” Blaine sounds awed. “That sounds awesome.” 

“I’ll talk to him for you,” Tina promises, determined to make this happen.

“Cool.” After a beat, Blaine asks, “Can you read me something?” 

She tries with the feminist theory but in the end, she hands over one of her Where’s Waldo books and watches, amused, as Blaine attempts to find a tiny red and white striped shirt figure in crowds of people with one good eye. 

It doesn’t make Tina/Jenna’s absense hurt any less, but this is the head canon I have for Tina and Blaine not being in the episode the Spanish Teacher.

Plus the head canon comes with added (and amazing - ilu Stacy and Andi) fic and pictures!

I love everyone in this bar.  <3333333333333333

lullllllllllz